From “I’m so honored!’ To “Why am I group texting at midnight?”

Becoming a Maid of Honor is a big deal. It’s your best friend’s actual once-in-a-lifetime moment, and she chose you to stand beside her through the chaos. You felt the excitement. You said yes. You probably cried.

And then…reality hit.

Suddenly, you’re planning events, wrangling group chats, talking your best friend’s off a cliff over charger plates, and wondering if you should’ve majored in logistics.

Let’s break it down. Here’s the emotional timeline of being a Maid of Honor — the highs, the lows, and everything in between.

1. The Ask

Feeling: Euphoric

She hands you a candle with a tag that says, “Will you be my Maid of Honor?” and you’re instantly sobbing. You say yes. You hug. You don’t fully know what you just signed up for, but it doesn’t matter — you’d do anything for her.

You text your mom. You make a Pinterest board. You’re glowing.

2. The Planning Phase begins

Feeling: Slightly overwhelmed, but motivated

You’ve got your checklist, your google doc, your secret “MOH” Pinterest board. The group chat is alive. You’ve sent out a poll. You’re organized.

3. The Group Chat Meltdown

Feeling: Chaos with a side of diplomacy

No one responds. Or everyone responds, but to the wrong thing. Suddenly, one bridesmaid can’t afford the trip, another thinks Nashville is “too basic,” and someone else is allergic to the AirBnB throw pillows.

You’re caught between being polite and snapping. You reread your messages 14 times before sending. You’ve officially entered your PR crises era.

4. The Bach weekend

Feeling: Exhausted but fulfilled.

You packed the bride’s emergency kit. You brought her favorite snacks. You made an itinerary. You made her feel like Beyoncé on tour.

You’re the first one up, last one to bed, and the one quietly washing dishes while everyone takes selfies.

Still… when she grabs your hand and says “thank you,” it is worth it.

5. The Shower

Feeling: Sentimental with a lite gift-bag stress

You helped plan it, helped host it, and wore a dress that coordinated with the napkins. You probably wrapped something in a bow. You smiled a lot.

You cried when she opened that baby photo album. You cried again when she gave you a card.

You also lowkey questioned why no one helped you carry 40 folding chairs back to your car, but that’s beside the point.

6. The Week of

Feeling: Hyper-vigilant, emotionally fragile, deeply caffeinated

You’re triple-checking timelines, texting the bride’s mom, confirming flower delivery, and making sure no one ruins the seating chart.

Every sentence you speak starts with “not to stress you out, but… ”

You’re also re-learning how to steam fabric and texting the bride’s mom thinks like “you’re beautiful” and “breathe” every 30 minutes.

7. The Wedding Day

Feeling: Like you’re floating and sprinting at the same time

You get her into the dress. You cry in the bathroom. You help bustle it later. You give the speech you practiced 100 times, even though your hands are shaking.

You make sure her lipstick is perfect, her snacks are packed, and no one talker to her about anything dumb. And when she walks down the aisle, you remember exactly why you said yes.

8. The Day After

Feeling: Hungover in every possible way (but proud)

Your feet hurt. Your brain is mush. You still have someone’s clutch. You’re crying at random again, but it’s happy tears now.

You get a text from her that says “I couldn’t have done this without you.” And you believer her. Because she’s right.

Final Thoughts

Being a Maid of Honor is part logistics coordinator, part therapist, part hype squad — and all heart. It’s not always sparkly robes and champagne toasts. It’s work. It’s showing up. It’s love. And if you’re in it right now, just know this: you’re doing better than you think. She picked you for a reason. And at the end of all the chaos, she’s going to look back and remember you were the one who held it down — and her up.

Now take a nap, you earned it.

Want more real talk from Inside the chaos?

Joint the Dairyland Bach mailing list- aka the group chat.

Planning tips that don’t make you cringe, behind-the-scenes mess, and the emotional support you didn’t know you needed.

🤍 XOXO Aly

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